P.S.A. - Allow Me to Introduce Myself

Allow me to re-introduce myself

My name is Kel - Oh, K to the EL to the LI

Okay, okay... Now normally, I'd start my very first blog (eeekkkk) off with some West Coast rap lyrics, but I do love Jay-Z and I'm introducing myself, so why not?! Starting a blog has been something I've been dreaming of doing for quite some time and I decided to finally just jump in and here we are!

Since rap lyrics aren't everyone's jam, and you maybe didn't get it above, my name is Kelli. I'm about to turn the dreaded 4-0 (wow, even typing that seems really odd). I was born, and raised, in Central Iowa. I recently got re-married and we're about to celebrate our one year anniversary in September. Planning a wedding during a world-wide pandemic was nuts and I'll make sure to post a blog about that too! Together we have four kiddos!! F-O-U-R (two girls/two boys). Three of which are teenagers and one is a toddler. See... now you get the "booze" part of the tagline, eh?

My "real" job besides being a wife and mama is being a full-time desk jockey. Now, I used to work as a Claims Adjuster and that changed my life is SO many ways (tons of stories there) but now I hold a different position and get to try to help fight crime in my own way! I also own a small floral business which primarily focuses on weddings and other special events. (Selfless plug, please check out Bellanie Flowers and give it a like). I started my college career as a nursing student, but switched to a business degree because I did genuinely like being a claims adjuster, even with all the crazy things that came up. Growing up I wanted to be a trauma surgeon, so you can see, I'm over here killing that dream!! Before my career as a badass claims adjuster, I was a preschool teacher. Now before you get all judgy-Karen-ish over there, thinking that "Oh, she played with kids all day", I'm gonna have to stop you right there. It's hell, like a good, fun, rewarding, finger-painting hell, but hell none the less. But it's hard, as fuck. Daycare providers, preschool teachers and teachers are angels and they deserve a special place in heaven!

I've always love to read and write. I "worked" as an editor of my high school's newspaper and am constantly reading at least one book. My "to-read" list is long and the stacks of books in my closet drive my husband, Cory, nuts (often times he can be heard saying "DAMN BOOKS" as he's stubbing his toe, yet again, on a stack of unread books). #Sorry #NotSorry On my journey of reading, my desire to write has just continued to grow and I felt that I needed an outlet so, here I am writing my blog and I hope you're still here reading it!

I know there are like a million "mom" "funny" type bloggers out there, but I'm so much better than them. I swear to God that I ask myself on a regular basis if my life is some kind of hidden camera show, so you will be very entertained! Wow, that was conceded. In reality, I hope you find my posts not only hilarious, but helpful. Even if they're helpful in a way that has you saying "Wow, I'm glad that I'm not the only one with a teenager wanting to do the next big TikTok challenge while my toddler screams that he has a mouthful of hair from 'kissing' our shedding husky." (YES, these things really do happen). I should explain my blog name also. PTO Dropout... Now that's really aiming high, right? Well, I tried the PTO. We were new to the school district and I figured I'd give it a shot. Well, it wasn't for me. If you love the PTO/PTA, good for you and nothing against it. It was just, um, how do you say it without pissing anyone off.... A LOT. It was just too much drama for me to handle, so I dipped out. Yep, I just stopped going. So, PTO dropout is who I am. I'm a damn good mom, but the PTO was too much for me.

Part of the title was P.S.A. and while that is a Jay-Z song, I want to let you all know that I cuss a lot. Usually in my writing it's not as much as my speaking, but sometimes it still comes out. And sometimes it's just needed to get your point across. I mean, unless you say "as fuck", as a verb and/or noun, how will people even know how hot it really is out? Sometimes it's just needed. My mom had a sailor's mouth and I try to reign it in, but sometimes I can't. So this is your warning. Also, I love rap music, especially old school hip-hop, I mean even to the point where my wedding introduction song was a hip hop song! Yeah, I'm that girl. I keep it real and while I'm trying to figure out who I am again (another blog on how I lost myself), I have roots that ran real deep that I didn't lose, I'm just relearning some of them. Besides the above, I love family game nights, horror movies and comedies, medical shows (#TeamGreys), baking and gardening. I visit my library weekly (I know, book nerd, sorry lol). I'm an introvert who loves lists and planners.

I hope you love it here. Please share my blog with your friends and help me grow. If you have any blog ideas, questions, or just some feedback, please let me know! I'm so excited to start this journey and to write about SO many things! Welcome! Thank you!